K Kaur -2002

I met Baba jee about one and a half year ago. I was convinced by a family member to go meet this Great Atma (Guru-jee). When we went to see him, his darshan brought so much vairaag (tears in His memory). I had this feeling that this is not an ordinary soul. He is someone great, but I could not come to grips with feeling as to what. I asked Baba-jee please bless me with ‘Naam-Daan’, not understanding the concept of bhagti, seva or ‘Naam-Daan’.

I am an ordinary kiram (worm) on this earth, asking for such a great data from such a great atma (soul). Just foolish not having any gyan (knowledge), was always the feeling anytime I want to be close to the Almighty. I used to go to Gurdwara once in a while. My husband & I used to come back and discuss between ourselves that sometimes the whole outfit used to seem like rituals and a pakhand.

Anyways, after I asked Baba-jee for Naam-Daan, he explained to me that Naam is not given so freely. I should go home and recite ‘Sukhmani Sahib’ for 3-4 months. From that day on my husband & I used to recite ‘Sukhmani Sahib’and try understanding it. With Guru-jee’s kirpa I started understanding ‘Sukhmani Sahib’. One day we asked Guru-jee to come to our house. Guru-jee is so kind, him & Mata-jee drove all the way.  When he came it is really hard to put in words how I felt, but I will give it a try. My heart was elated. I felt it was Parbrahm Himself who has entered our house, and chotte mata-jee was with him. I just can not describe the feeling but will only say ‘meri sudh budh visar gayee’. I just wanted to sit by his feet and him to shower me with his love. The love I felt for him is indescribable.

After a couple of weeks Baba-jee was going to USA. T ji suggested to go along with the sangat. We went to the Sangat in USA. Baba ji showered his blessings on us that day and gave us Naam-Daan. There again the feeling was out of this world. That day I realized how much koorh I had been doing. I begged Baba-jee to forgive us and take us under his wings. From that day on this kiram has not looked back. I am on a new path. All I want to do is to do ‘Satnaam’ jaap. I get so much raas (enjoyment)  when I sit and do ‘Satnaam’ jaap. Baba-jee’s presence is always around us. I have no desires for worldly things (going to movies, parties, listening to songs ..). All I wish to hear is ‘Satnaam’ jaap day and night. Baba-jee’s sangat has totally turned us around. When Baba-jee came to our house and left, the Amrit was everywhere. Wherever I sat down I would start reciting ‘Satnaam’ jaap. Everybody I came across found it strange and said I had been hypnotized by Baba-jee. Little did they know that this mahan atma had changed my life. He had shown me the “light”. Everybody and everything seemed so beautiful and it got me in tune with His nature. I used to get so involved in family politics, would do nindya-chugli with friends. After Baba-jee’s sangat all I want to do is talk about God and Baba-jee, recite His name and nothing else. This would seem like a circus and so temporary. I would not say that I have achieved it all, but in such a short time I do see big changes in my life.

My Husband's Experience:

At first I used to go into the room lock myself in and do Naam-jaap. My husband could not understand this. He was so baffled and would say to me what is this. I would beg him to leave me alone. When I went to work, I would go to park & cry, and remember Baba-jee. I used to weep like a child in his yaad. People would say you look so lost, are you going to be okey. My husband slowly started understanding what was going on and he started to go to Baba-jee’s sangat. Baba-jee did great kirpa on him. Now he goes to sangat as much as I did. We are totally involved and love sangat. It is our only purpose anymore. We would love to go everywhere but sometimes distance gets in the way. We miss sangat a lot. We have never met such humble human beings like we do meet in sangat. To put in short, it is our life now and we hope Guru-jee will always keep us under his ‘chattar’. We love him with all our heart.

A Humble Kiram (Worm)

K Kaur